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The Spectator
How Many Lettuce Heads?
by Joshua Hicks '09Arts & Entertainment Writer
School is almost out and what have we learned? Boys will be boys, girls just wanna have fun and my favorite response to work: I don't wanna work; I wanna bang on the drum all day. Sounds like a party, right? Between Old School and Animal House, boys are taught to be as reckless, shameless, naked, loud and obscene as possible. I also want to throw Grease on the list since I was just singing "Summer Loving" to one of my friends. Another favorite of mine is Rock and Roll High School, which features the Ramones.
If you're in real need of procrastination in the upcoming week, call your buddies, lock your doors, and throw on Office Space. Though this film has nothing to do with school whatsoever, it is a fantastic take on how bad work really is for our souls. Think about it! No, you better not. This film gets five out of five Lettuce Heads for a superb depiction of one man's struggle for wealth and love, while dealing with the oppression of the work place. Good luck seniors!
I can't help but think that my own "end is near" and therefore come up with some apocalyptic reviews. Everybody loves it when the earth is on the brink of destruction, right? I never quite enjoyed Waterworld, though the concept intrigued me. If I had my choice between Amargeddon and Deep Impact, I would have to ask myself, "do I want Frodo to save the world (again) or Bruce Willis?" There are also plenty of flicks in which humans have the power to bring mass destruction upon ourselves. Take The Day The Earth Stood Still (1950's version, don't even think about the recent release), which depicts aliens invading planet Earth because humans threaten the universe with their nuclear power.
Other alien movies, Species, Signs, and Starship Troopers to name a few, are just terrible. I will say that I prefer Independence Day to the Alien and Predator blood-filled thrillers. Whatever floats your boat, but remember one thing... if you seen green lights, run.
My top "end of the world" movie would have to be The Fifth Element, and you can thank my sweetheart for that. After thousands and thousands of years, an evil force in the universe seeks to destroy all in its path, and the only counter attack is the physical embodiment of good (Milla Jovovich), who turns human, learns to speak English and follows Bruce Willis in his taxi cab. The very talented Gary Oldman (The Dark Knight), Chris Tucker (Rush Hour) and Ian Holm (from Garden State and Bilbo in Lord of the Rings) also star in this bizarre, humorous, and action packed flick. I have to give it five out of five Lettuce Heads for its unique style. And by the way, Armageddon is the better pick.